I was an only child

Family portrait
Originally uploaded by Beckerbuns

When I was growing up, I always longed for a sibling, preferably a boy since I was such a tomboy myself. My parents tried to have another baby when I was around 10, but I guess it wasn't meant to be because they never did conceive again.

Being an only child, I grew up really fast. I could go to parties with my parents and hold intelligent conversations with adults with no problems.

I was a little lonely. When my school friends were all busy, I was bored with no one to play with. However, I developed a terrific imagination from all this solo play. I had a massive collection of Star Wars action figures and playsets, and built elaborate worlds with them, not having to worry about a little brother or sister knocking them down or messing them up.

I had trouble with teasing. I didn't know how to react to it. My two boy cousins (brothers) used to tease me mercilessly, and I'd just cry and run away. I didn't know then that the best way to discourage them would have been to just ignore them or joke back at them. How would I know? I had no experience! I figured it out later on and they were disappointed, I think, to have the wind taken out of their sails.

As I grew older, I decided I wanted a huge family -- at least six kids. That way no one would ever be in this position that I was in. After I got to adulthood I realized that would probably not be possible, at least not in California, Silicon Valley to be more specific. It's just too expensive here to raise a regular-sized family, let alone a large family!

When Ricky was born and diagnosed with the genetic disease cystic fibrosis, I could have decided not to have any more children because of the CF (I know lots of parents who have made that decision), but I didn't. I was determined that Ricky would not be an only child. We conceived Andy when Ricky was about 1-1/2, and waited on pins and needles for his amniocentesis results (we were going to keep him either way, but it was still nerve-wracking!).

Andy's fine, and our family is now complete. The boys play together, tease each other (and let it roll of their backs), laugh together, throw food at each other, and do all the things that brothers do. In a way it makes me wish that I'd had a sibling or two, but I know that I am a better person, in my own way, for having been an only child.